Warning Labels
created: Friday, January 07, 2000
Thanks to Hope Farmer for sending me these gems. Enjoy.
Joke Category True Stories—Rating G
In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods:
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On Sears hair dryer: |
Do not use while sleeping
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On a bag of Fritos: |
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary Details inside
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On a bar of Dial soap: |
Directions: Use like regular soap
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Some Swanson frozen dinners: |
Serving suggestion: Defrost
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On a hotel-provided shower cap in a box: |
Fits one head
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On Tesco’s Tiramisu desert: |
Do not turn upside down (Printed on the bottom of the box)
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On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: |
Product will be hot after heating
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On packaging for a Rowenta Iron: |
Do not iron clothes on body
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On Boot’s Children’s Cough Medicine |
Do not drive car or operate machinery
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On Nytol (a sleep aid): |
Warning: may cause drowsiness
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On a Korean kitchen knife: |
Warning keep out of children
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On a string of Chinese-made Christmas lights: |
For indoor or outdoor use only
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On a Japanese food processor: |
Not to be used for the other use
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On Sainsbury’s Peanuts |
Warning: contains nuts
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On an American Airlines packet of nuts: |
Instructions: open packet, eat nuts
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On a Swedish chain saw: |
Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands